the first thing i thought when i saw the cover of the new vanity fair was, damn! baby suri has an unusually full head of hair for a 4-month-old. then i read about the newest conspiracy theory regarding that baby and her alleged parents, “tomkat.” and it all makes sense!
this story sort of explains some of the earlier mysteries. why did katie’s bump keep fluctuating in size? why did it take so long for us to get a glimpse of suri? what was up with the birth certificate? and why the hell does that bastard child have so much hair?
apparently some feel that the baby daddy is really katie’s ex, chris klein. suri was conceived just before they parted ways, but tom decided to claim the kid as his own. katie’s bump was cleverly concealed for a few months, then the baby’s real birth in december was kept hush-hush. katie then used a decoy belly until april, and then kept the baby under lock-and-key until it’s age (and hair) would no longer be a reasonable issue of speculation.
yes, this is a highly elaborate and very silly-sounding scheme. but if you really think about the details, it sure seems plausible, doesn’t it?
