¡viva la graham!

They might still be playing the shit out of “Paparazzi” on the radio and in clubs here in the U.S., but that hasn’t stopped the ubiquitous Lady GaGa from releasing her brand new single, “Bad Romance.” It’s the first new track from the re-release of her multi-platinum debut, which the dance-floor phenom has titled The Fame Monster.

Critics have called it a “Poker Face” retread — and they may have a point — but no one can deny that GaGa is on a roll. She’s the biggest name in pop music right now, and the familiar tempo of the song will likely work in her favor. Listen for yourself:

Lady GaGa – Bad Romance

The “Bad Romance” video is set to debut this week (watch this space!), and the deluxe double-disc edition of The Fame Monster will be out Nov 23. Now you know what to get for the little fagling in your life for Christmas!

I love me some Lady GaGa but this shit right here is not flattering. Where to start? The hair, the makeup, the bubbles? I’m happy for her scoring the cover of Rolling Stone, but I can’t help but feel bad because she looks terrible.

On a positive note, latest single “Love Game” is shaping up to be North American hit no. 3 for GaGa. The track recently leaped into the top thirty and looks set to go top twenty in the next few weeks. So despite an unfortunate magazine cover, she must be doing something right.

Don’t get me wrong. I love the ’80s tranny alien look that Lady GaGa works on a daily basis. I can even handle the french-cut leotards. However, after seeing this photo it’s obvious that she needs to put her stylist on crotch duty — stat!

First she flashed her tampon string, which is embarrassing enough. Now, due to an apparent wardrobe malfunction of sorts, it appears that Lady GaGa has forgotten to tuck her little dicklet. Something tells me this isn’t the disco stick she’s singing about in “Love Game.”

In the 5th (!) video from Lady GaGa, the shamelessly suggestive “Love Game,” she decided to sex it up a little — and that’s saying something considering how steamy some of her past clips have been. Let’s take a scandal inventory: she’s naked, covered in glitter; she’s in the middle of a three-way, legs straight up in the air; and choreography includes plenty of gratuitous crotch-grabbing.

Surely the hot girl-on-girl makeout session in the subway station vestibule will garner the most attention. GaGa has been open about her bisexuality, so in the video the shots cut back and forth between two attractive uniformed cops — one male, one female. Let’s just say it looks like she’s enjoying herself.

So what are you waiting for? Watch it already!

Due to the delayed reaction to Lady GaGa in the U.S., we probably won’t be hearing “Eh Eh (Nothing Else I Can Say)” on the radio until summer at the very soonest. Second single “Poker Face” is currently climbing Billboard’s Hot 100, but in Australia Lady GaGa just released the aforementioned track as her third single. Otherwise known as THE BALLAD.

Since her global success is finally a reality, the record label seems to have spared no expense for the promo video. It’s much different than previous clips — no debauched after hours parties here! — and it’s a welcome change for a song that presents a stark contrast to her dance diva image.

They’ve gone the retro Italian route this go-round (it is GaGa’s heritage, you know), and the results are mostly beautiful. Let’s pretend the yellow feather dress toward the end never happened and we’ve got ourselves a winner! Check it out (before it disappears!):